Self-Esteem - The most important life-skill a child can have!

Self-Esteem – The most important life-skill a child can have

4 February 2019

By: Vidhya Shailesh, SoulKids® Program Manager, www.soulkids.org

Imagine if your child could be confident!

Imagine if your child could be happy given any situation!

Imagine if your child could have the ability to handle anything life sends their way!

SoulKids® helps them with this and more. And it all starts with high self-esteem. Self-Esteem is a sense of belief in one’s own ability, capacity and capability and it is a nurtured skill.

A child with high self-esteem appears more confident, happy and self-assured. They are not afraid to make mistakes and even try new things. They are more open to new ideas and willing to learn. They know and believe that if they put their mind to it, they can achieve anything. Children with high-self-esteem are happy children. They know their strengths and learn to work on them. They have an “I can do it!” attitude.

There are many ways this can be nurtured in a child. Some of the ways are listed below.

1. Foster a positive environment of love at home. Children who are loved, have a feeling of belonging and this greatly helps with their own self-belief. Tell them often that you love them and appreciate them.

2. The rigors of parenthood, school and life can often take a toll on everyone in the family. Ensure you set aside plenty of quality time to spend with your children. Let this time be all about them and what they are doing. Encourage them to share their experiences, their ideas and their thoughts and feelings. Involve them in household chores and help them feel valued and important.

3. Encourage them to be open-minded and try new things. Help them identify things they are good at and praise them for it. Appreciate their efforts rather than the results. And help them see their own progress. Teach them that failure is a part of learning.

4. Encourage them to form many friendships. Growing up years can bring up a bag of emotions for children – so make sure you are always there to hear them out and support and guide them, should they ask for help.

5. Keep negative talk out as much as you can. Comments like, “you are so slow…”, “you are no good” slowly and steadily damage their own self-esteem. Rather be positive in your feedback, for example, “Shall we try getting this task done in 20minutes?” or “That was much better than the last time.”

6. Avoid comparing them with their peers, siblings or friends. Each child has their own strengths and capabilities and as a parent you must help them find theirs. Comparisons only make them feel worse about themselves.

7. Model the behavior you want your children to emulate. But know that they also sometimes need to learn things for themselves. Make sure you are supportive and always there for them. Let them watch you fall and pick yourself up. When they see you do it, it becomes easier for them to try it too.

8. Avoid setting a high standard for them to live up to. Encourage them to constantly work towards excellence but keep your expectations out of it. For a child already working/trying hard, the burden of expectations is just too much to bear.

Parenting is a learning process too. Invest in your own learning and keep growing. With the right supportive environment around them, children will thrive in any giving situation and their self-esteem will grow.

At SoulKids®, our training is geared towards raising a child’s sense of self-esteem, to see their natural strengths, talents and abilities and to strengthen their sense of self-belief. Through fun games and stories, children grow in confidence and step into the world as happy and confident individuals. They learn to appreciate differences amongst each other and become more comfortable being themselves. They learn to believe in themselves and be the best they can be.

To find out more about our programs, please visit www.soulkids.org or email us at soulkids@soulcentre.org for more information. We offer group programs for different age groups and even offer one-on-one coaching if your child requires specific help and guidance.

Teaching Children Gratitude

Teaching Children Gratitude

By: Vidhya Shailesh, SoulKids® Program Manager, www.soulkids.org

17 December 2018

Gratitude is an essential life skill for children and adults alike. It is the ability for us to be thankful for all that life presents to us. It is the ability to appreciate whatever comes our way.  Gratitude is a positive emotion that can help us become happier and healthier. It is a powerful force that lays the foundation for us to attract more good into our lives. Practicing gratitude is a skill we must inculcate not just in our children but in ourselves too. Gratitude can benefit children and adults in many ways. A person who is grateful often does not compare himself with others and is happy with himself.

As parents, we strive to provide the best upbringing for our children. Whether that means sending them to the best school there is, or supporting their education with classes, extra-curricular activities, the best clothes that we can afford and anything else that we can provide for them. Within our capacity we stretch to provide them the best that we possibly can. However, a parents struggle is just that – a parents struggle. A child growing up with all that they have received starts to believe they are entitled to have all that they do. They start to assume the parents will support them no matter what. The parents struggle is not what a child sees. All they see is what they are provided.

Inculcating the attitude of gratitude from a young age will ensure children have the ability to appreciate the many things in their own lives. Gratitude helps us foster better relationships, improves physical health, psychological health, enhances empathy and compassion, helps you get better sleep, improves self-esteem and mental strength among many other things.

Here are some ways we can encourage children to develop an attitude of gratitude.

1. Encourage the use of the magic words please and thank you.

2. Encourage empathy and teach them to help someone less fortunate than they are.

3. Teach them to openly appreciate and compliment others.

4. Appreciate the little things that they do for you and reciprocate your gratitude for their actions.

5. Children learn by imitation, express gratitude in your day and do it often in front of them too.

6. Share your gratitude – set a specific time in the day when you talk to them about the many things they are thankful for. It could be a bedtime routine or on the dinner table or another time best suited to you.

7. Encourage them to not just show appreciation but also be kind and considerate in their actions.

8. Volunteering and giving of your time, efforts and support is a great way to inculcate gratitude in them. Perhaps you can make it a family activity.

9. Encourage them to differentiate between their needs and their wants.

10. Be patient. While it might seem like instilling gratitude is hard, know that in time they will learn it.

Christmas is a wonderful time for giving. Encourage children to give or share with those less fortunate. Giving can be of your time, your efforts, your resources or money. Appreciate any efforts they take and encourage them no matter how small their efforts are. In time, the attitude of gratitude will become a way of life for them.

Our SoulKids® programs are designed to give children the skills required to create their own happiness and success. And gratitude plays a very important part in this. In our group classes, we encourage children to appreciate the differences among each other and see each other’s strengths. Rather than focusing on what they have, they learn to be thankful for the same things. Children learn many other valuable life-skills in a fun, positive and engaging environment. They always leave happy, excited, positive and wanting more.

To find out more about our programs, please visit www.soulkids.org or email us at soulkids@soulcentre.org for more information. We offer group programs for different age groups and even offer one-on-one coaching if your child requires specific help and guidance.

Exam Stress

Exam Stress

3 December 2018

By: Vidhya Shailesh, SoulKids Program manager, www.soulkids.org 

Exam time can be a stressful time for children. The burden of expectation from themselves and their parents, peer pressure, performance anxiety can all lead to stress among children. Children need the support and understanding of their parents the most during this stressful time.

Here are a few simple guidelines for you to support and help alleviate stress for your children during this period.

1. Don’t add to their stress

Make sure as parents, you are a source of comfort for them rather than adding onto their stress. Have realistic expectations of your children and try not to impose your own expectations on them. Let them know it is normal for them to feel nervous and talk to them to help them release their own anxiety. Frequent talks, simple breathing exercises, keeping track of their own study progress can all help them feel better.

2. Follow a healthy eat and sleep routine

Support them by helping them eat regular meals, which are healthy. Ensure they get enough sleep. A rested mind is several times more effective than a tired mind.

3. Encourage them to organize their study time and take regular breaks

Organized children feel more in control and chances are they will be less stressed out. Help your children create a study timetable. Help them do it themselves and resist the urge to create one for them. If children create their own timetables that they are comfortable with, they are more likely to stick to it. Ensure there are sufficient breaks in between. Encourage them to exercise, go for short walks, and play something, read a book during their breaks. Breaks must that help them rest their minds so they feel more refreshed.

4. Help them take ownership and responsibility for their work

Children have to take responsibility for their own performance. Only then will they be willing to put in effort on their own accord. Constantly pushing them to study will only cause them frustration. Guide them to this understanding. Children who are motivated and self-driven are the ones who take responsibility for their actions. To this effect, help them set achievable goals for themselves.

5. Remind them to focus on the task at hand

An important aspect of time management is to remind them to focus on the task at hand. The idea of upcoming exams can overwhelm children and they can loose sight of what they need to focus on. By getting distracted with the many exams they must give, their efforts only get dissipated. Remind them to focus on the tests one at a time.

Children must learn and understand that only efforts produce results. They must also understand that scores are a feedback to help you understand what you need to work on. Appreciate their efforts rather than focusing on the results.

At SoulKids® we teach children that there is no substitute for hard work. Only with hard work and focus, can results be accomplished. It is natural for children to feel anxious and worried about their exams. Keep the focus on the effort and learning and not on the results. Keep a positive mindset and attitude and encourage them to do the same.

To find out more about our programs and one-on-one coaching, please visit www.soulkids.org or email us at soulkids@soulcentre.org.

Register your children for our transformational programs or coaching sessions and help them create their own happiness and success.

Strategies for helping a child cope with stress

Strategies for helping a child cope with stress

19 November 2018

By Vidhya Shailesh, SoulKids® Program Manager

Stress in the workplace is something we all as adults are familiar with. We often assume stress to be a by-product of our work and its demands. However, what we fail to understand is that stress is essentially a by-product of our own thoughts. And just as it is common among adults, children too face stress in their growing up years.

The rigors of an academic expectation, keeping up with their activities, peer pressure, social troubles, friend problems, a change in the home/school environment can all contribute towards childhood stress. The factors might be academic, social or emotional but they can all cause struggles for children. Common indicators for stress among children include poor time-management, a very emotional child that cries at the smallest issue, children withdrawing socially, being sad/upset/anxious all of the time, performance in school/activities deteriorating, increased negative self-talk, changes in appetite and sleep patterns, refusal to go to school and many others.

At the first indication of any such behavioral changes, it is necessary that as parents/ care givers we step in to help and guide the children through the issue. Parents and teachers are the first ones to observe any changes in the children’s behavior. And when we do, we must step in to guide them through it rather than just wait for it to sort out itself.

Here are a few strategies to help children through stress.

1. Ensure children are not overloaded.

As parents, sometimes we believe we must keep children busy. While this is productive, you must observe your own children and understand what their capacity is. If you find your child struggling to manage everything, cut down on their activities. Help them pick and choose and ensure they have sufficient time in between. For older children, ensure that time is sufficient for them to catch up on their work and be on top of things. Over worked children lack enthusiasm and excitement and often everything becomes just a chore that they need to complete. Instead pick what they really enjoy and help them give their hundred percent. You will find their productivity increases and they are happier.

2. Speak to children often

Make sure you speak to them every day about the happenings at school. Let them come to you even with mundane happenings of the day. It just sets the ground for open communication and gives them the feeling that they can approach you for anything. Make sure you do not judge their ideas or inputs. Respect their views as that gives them the feeling that you are always there for them. Try not to criticize or put them down. Give them positive feedback and encourage them to seek solutions. When they are stressed, they need to see you as the person who will have a calming effect on them. Be positive and open.

3. Practice simple relaxation techniques with them.

Encourage them to find what helps them de-stress. It could be a run in the park, a game of basketball, a board game, or even some simple breathing techniques. Children require free playtime on a regular basis either with friends or by themselves. Set aside sometime for them to play. Ensure they get sufficient sleep. Rest is just as important as activity.

4. Encourage them to stay positive

Stress often is a consequence of fear. And the first thing fear does is sends your thoughts on a negative spiral. Help them recognize this pattern and understand that no matter what happens they must try and stay positive and that will help them handle the situation better.

5. Do not shy away from seeking help

At home parents are the first support system for children. However, children spend lots of their time at school and with their friends. Connect with their friends and also the parent community. Teachers can play a very important role in a child’s growing up years and their inputs can be very valuable. Work alongside the teachers and school councilors to address any issues early on. Depending on the nature of the issue, external help can also be sought. The child’s wellbeing should be a priority.

SoulKids® coaching is a wonderful way to help children through any difficulties they might be facing. Coaching is done one-on-one and is based on a friendly and positive relationship between the child and their coach. SoulKids® coaches uses a variety of different strategies to help children deal with stress and overcome them in a positive manner. A coaching relationship is highly beneficial for a child and ensures any issues are caught and dealt with at an early stage. The child’s wellbeing and happiness is always the coach’s top priority.

To find out more about our programs and one-on-one coaching, please visit www.soulkids.org or email us at soulkids@soulcentre.org.

Register your children for our transformational programs or coaching sessions and help them create their own happiness and success.

SoulKids® in Romania - Making a difference one child at a time

SoulKids® in Romania - Making a difference one child at a time

5 February 2018

By Dana Ilies, SoulKids® Mentor and Coach, Romania

After I finished my SoulKids® Mentor training I was asked to write a few words about myself for the Mentor page on the SoulKids® website. And this is what I wrote:

“Dana believes that when we give children the tools to lead a better life, our future will be a better and brighter world. Dana wants to change the world one child at a time!”

I did not know how I was going to go about doing this and I did not have a plan back then (that was in April 2016). But somehow, when you have a clear intention, the universe shows you the way. I continued to work as a SoulKids® Mentor in Singapore for 2 more years, teaching and inspiring children.

Early this year, we had to return to our home country Romania after many years overseas. I did not have a doubt in my mind about continuing my SoulKids® mission in Romania. It was a program I believed in and knew I wanted to continue to teach. We landed on April 3rd and my first program was on May 19th. It was sold out. The feedback I got was amazing and I continued with many more Programs following that.

Children in Romania love SoulKids®, and after every program I feel that I am one step closer to my goal. Parents benefit from SoulKids® too. A few days ago one parent told me that he sometimes tells himself “Always say yes, never give up”, something we teach children during the SoulKids® classes. It has been an amazing journey for me and I look forward to conducting many more successful programs here in Romania.

I end by encouraging all of you out there to believe you can make a difference in the world. There is no such thing as too small or too insignificant.

A few days ago I read a story about a girl, who was throwing back stranded Starfish from the beach into the sea. A man saw her and said there are thousands of stranded Starfish on the beach, you can only throw back a few of them, what difference does it make? And the girl answered while picking up one more Starfish, it makes a difference for this one.

Romania is one more file in the SoulKids® success story, and for that I am grateful to Vikas, the wisest teacher, to Sally Forrest who believed in me and brought me here, and to Vidhya Shailesh who guided me on my journey.

SoulKids®, Romania salutes you!

To find out more about our programs, please visit www.soulkids.org or email us atsoulkids@soulcentre.org for more information. We offer group programs for different age groups and even offer one-on-one coaching if your child requires specific help and guidance.

Life-skills for today's child

Life-skills for today’s child

24 September 2018

By: Vidhya Shailesh, SoulKids® Program Manager, www.soulkids.org 

We live in a constantly changing environment. The world as we know it today is drastically different from what it was while we were growing up. The environment, the social structure, the education systems, the lifestyle have all changed and adapted. In this ever-changing world, it is essential that we forever keep an open mind and embrace a growth mindset. What was relevant twenty years ago might not be today. We must keep up to the times.

As parents or caregivers, our job is to make our children future ready. Just as the world today is very different from the one we grew up in, the world that our children will live in is guaranteed to be different too. We must equip our children with the skills needed to adapt to this changing world, to make the most of it and to live a successful life. We cannot imagine what the world of tomorrow will be like for our children. By limiting their thought process or imposing beliefs in their mindsets, we are only limiting their potential. Instead, empower them with the right mindset and belief systems that help them create a life by choice.

This is where life-skills education plays a very important role. Children need to learn certain essential life-skills, which help them, navigate this journey of life with ease. Life-skills that help them create their own happiness and success no matter what. Life-skills that help them in any given situation.

Listed below are a few life-skills that are more relevant and essential today for children growing up.

1. Embrace Differences

Children need to be taught early to embrace the differences amongst their peers. We live in a world where geographical boundaries are fast diminishing and people travel far and wide. It is therefore very possible children might have around them others from various countries, cultural backgrounds, ethnicities etc. They must learn to embrace all of these differences and understand that this diversity should be celebrated.

2. Self-Belief

Self-Belief is a sense of trust and confidence in your own abilities and judgments. Children need to be encouraged right from a very young age to trust their own choices and to believe in themselves. A high sense of self-belief helps them approach every new experience with enthusiasm and helps bring out their potential.   

3. Resilience

In an attempt to give our children the perfect upbringing, sometimes we end up shielding them from failure. However failure is one of the greatest teachers for children. It teaches them to pick themselves up and despite their disappointment, try again. It teaches them to learn from the experience and not give up.

4. Positive thinking

Children must learn the importance of positive thinking. They must be taught to always see the good in every situation. Being positive helps them feel happy and helps them be in control of their emotions. A positive mindset leads the way for anything they wish to achieve in their lives. Be positive around them and encourage them to be positive too.

5. Teamwork

Children need to learn the importance of teamwork. In any social or professional capacity, teamwork is necessary.  Children need to learn the skills required to work with others. Be it in a leadership capacity or as a team member, teamwork is an essential life skill.

SoulKids® training is geared towards teaching children these very life-skills among several others. In a fun and engaging environment, children learn many valuable skills that help them through any given situation in life. They develop the right mindset and belief systems that support them and help them create their own happiness and success. Children love the program and always want to keep coming back for more.

Our next program is happening on November 10 & 11 for 6-12 year olds. Register your children to have them benefit. 

To find out more about our programs, please visit www.soulkids.org or email us at soulkids@soulcentre.org for more information. We offer group programs for different age groups and even offer one-on-one coaching if your child requires specific help and guidance.

Resilience - A much needed skill for children

Resilience – A much needed skill for Children

By Sally Forrest
BSc, MRPharmS, MBA.
11th September 2018

Resilience is the ability to pick yourself up when things do not go your way.
The ability to recover from setbacks and difficulties, the ability to have mental toughness.

Resilience is a skill that can be taught in children (and adults) and the earlier it is taught; the better life will become.
Life will not always go the way we expect it to, and this statement alone will change the way your child reacts to life.

Life often throws us a curve ball; Death of a loved one, Divorce, Redundancy, Moving Country, Loss of a Pet …the list is endless. The question we have to answer is “How do we deal with this new situation and how do we get our life back on track?"

Children are tough!
Do not treat them otherwise. Expose them to the Ups and Downs that life throws their way.

How can you develop Resilience in your child? Here are 4 easy steps:

1)    Talk OpenlyTalk about how you have dealt with issues in your own past, how did you feel, what actions did you take to get back on track and how you managed to turn life around once more.

2)    Expose them to other people’s experiences.If a friend has an issue then do not be the only one who offers support. Discuss the situation openly in the family and expose your children to life’s challenges at an early age.

3)    Accept that Change is normal.If we expect that life will always be the same, then we will sadly be disappointed. Explain to your child the concept of life cycles, show them this in nature. At an early age get them to understand that everything will one day pass away. Demonstrate this with the seasons in nature - the leaves fall, the grass grows and is harvested, butterflies are here for a short time and then move on.
The sooner we all accept that each day that passes is one less day we have to live on this wonderful planet, then the sooner we start to appreciate all the good things we have in life.

4)    Nurture positivity.Self-confidence and a positive outlook in life will see you through any crisis. Develop the attitude that “no matter what happens in life, I can deal with it”.

Whenever your child has an issue, do not jump in and solve it for them. Ask them questions to get them to suggest answers and ways forward.

At SoulKids we offer one on one coaching for your child in addition to group programs.
Please do connect and register your child for one of our upcoming workshops: soulkids@soulcentre.org