I have been learning
meditation with Vikas for a
few years now, and also do my best to live life based on the wisdom he shares.
It is only from this foundation of wisdom and practice that I can now say that
the universe sent me a powerful wake-up call recently…
One evening in early September I collapsed in
blinding severe pain that hit my brain during my normal exercise routine.
Apparently my brain was haemorrhaging from a burst blood vessel. It was what I
later discovered is called a brain aneurysm.
Recalling the moment it happened I can only
describe the sense of utter helplessness I felt when I was racked with
immobility, pain and visible symptoms of a heart attack.
How the wisdom supports you
Immediately I realized a ‘storm of life’ was
hitting me. In my studies with Vikas, he describes crisis and the vicissitudes
of life as a ‘storm on the ocean’. A force of nature absolutely beyond your control,
which hits you without warning! Instantly I also heard a voice saying ‘chant
your mantra’. Clinging to my mantra, still
surrounded by intense pain, I gradually dissolved into dark unconsciousness.
I know Vikas would ask me 'So what life lessons
have you learnt from this situation?' In summary I would say life can throw you
a curve ball anytime, and you better be RAW about it. That means ready, able
and willing...to deal with it.
Quickly applying my spiritual tools
The next thing I remember is that I regained
consciousness in a high dependency unit of a public hospital. My recollection
of the details of my checks and diagnosis is poor as I was not conscious most
of the time.
One is seldom ready mentally, emotionally and
physically, to manage a sudden accident or health crisis. From the onset, I was
reeling from extreme physical pain and was in a constant dazed state. It was
also a state of tremendous uncertainty, as a precise diagnosis of my condition
could not be determined at that stage. The news was that I would need to wait
ten days before a clearer CT scan could be done.
My family members remained calm and attended to the
matters on hand. As for myself, I found myself retreating deep within, to seek
mental strength and spiritual stability. I was so physically exhausted that for
the moment it fatigued my mind so much it did not play its usual role of
creating negative thoughts of worry, unhappiness, anxiety, etc.
What is noticeable as one regains some semblance of
strength and mental activity is the sense of fear and being shaken right to the
core of your being by the magnitude and seriousness of the event that has hit
you.
At this stage, let me share the array of thoughts
and actions that flowed in me – for those that helped me I give my deepest
thanks to Vikas, and for those that disappointed me I take them as reminders of
the need to correct myself.
The wisdom works
One of the fundamental wisdom teachings Vikas had
taught me without letting up is the appropriate method to respond to life
situations - to accept what life brings, before consciously choosing and
applying the best response. When I brought acceptance to my current pain and
situation, I noted the mind was at peace and my very person felt a strong sense
of inner equipoise. Then I became aware of a reserve of deep energies within.
Instinctively, I placed my hands on my body towards my heart centre...I was instinctively
directing Reiki energy to my body (another thing I had learnt at SoulCentre). I
was falling into trained patterns of wisdom and action even as I lay flat on my
back with spasms of pain, ingesting no less than 8 to 10 pills every four hour
interval, and with vials of blood being extracted daily.
What I can honestly attest to is this - the
foremost tool in transforming one's life and buffering life's ups and downs is
the practice of meditation. It is a discipline I have done for the past nine
years following the instructions of my wisdom teacher, Vikas. Whilst the
purpose was to elevate one's spiritual growth, the powerful benefits of
meditation emerged in this very moment of one's corporeal and mental fight for
strength. I found it amazing that while most of my time I was lying in the
hospital bed with little mobility, I was facing the 'woes' with forbearance and
quiet fortitude.
Another tool my beloved teacher taught me are prayers.
I set aside short moments to pray to Divine Source requesting stamina and
healing, giving thanks for its love, support, guidance and protection. These
moments were important as they filled me with peaceful silence and inner calm.
Needing help from dependable friends to assist my
family and myself, I realised I needed my inner circle friends. They are my
friends who walked the same spiritual path and study with my teacher. With
little need to exchange words and explanations, they were friends who understood
their purpose and roles when I asked them to help me. With great clarity, they
advised me to retreat into my inner core, connect to a higher Source through
the chanting of my mantra, and bring to bear the lessons of Vikas and constantly
remind myself of the many nuggets of wise words he had imparted to me.
I decided to simply 'go with the flow' with as
little resistance as possible. The moments of suffering and unhappiness
occurred for sure; specially during meal times when hospital food lived up to its
legendary reputation of being tasteless and unappetizing. I was disgusted
enough to summon the Hospital’s Food Manager to rain a torrent of 'positive
feedback' on him. I thought I was giving proper education and perspective to
the harassed individual; and it was only on looking back that I realized I was
fuelled by unhappiness and non-acceptance.
Another dangerous but comical incident happened soon
after and brought anger rising to the fore. A nurse gave me a pill the size of
a 20cent coin to swallow. I paid little heed to what I was doing and when the
foul pill entered my throat I almost choked! With the water I drank to swallow
it, the pill was foaming and fizzing rabies-like, and I was thrashing and
flailing my limbs, almost choking to death, I believed! My guests looked on at me with abject
helplessness and confusion as I could not speak. I realized my dilemma but
could do little to explain the eye-popping horror I was going through.
To cut a long story short, the pill was an
effervescent tablet which should have been mixed into the water rather than
being given to me to swallow. After I eventually coughed it out, I had barely enough
energy left to give the nurse a good sounding off. One of the visitors at the
time was Vikas, my beloved teacher, who then calmly said 'Everything is fine.
You are safe and the nurse has learnt her lesson for sure’. Only then did I
awake from my red haze of anger. The good that came out of this was the nurse
returned to apologise, all was good with me and I accepted her apologies with a
happy heart.
So, what are the life lessons at this stage? Even
in the worst of circumstances, one must never wallow in self-pity and be sucked
into the situation. Do not label the situation as a bad one but accept that it
just 'is'. Do not allow resistance to ‘what is’ rear its ugly head, as that is
what intensifies suffering. Accept the situation and apply the wisdom tools and
techniques one has been practicing and learning. These tools act as a stabiliser and surround
one with a positive energy - a shield to block the bad stuff out, and this supports
one's healing.
Today I am fully recovered, and I am so indebted to
Vikas’ ceaseless and repetitive teachings and reminders! They allowed me to go
through a storm of my life with peace, patience and positive energy.
As he teaches – pain is inevitable, but suffering
is optional!
Submitted by RCWK (a
meditation student of Vikas)
If you would like more information about the unique meditation programs created by Vikas Malkani and offered by SoulCentre® please contact:
Vikas Malkani / SoulCentre
Mobile: (65) 9875 2372
